This weekend we had our friends from the High Desert come up and stay the night with their 2 kids. Sarah, Josh and I went to Jr. High together. Josh and Sarah had even attended the same preschool! When we all get together it's kind of like Jr. High all over again minus the big hair and acne.
We decided to play Cranium Saturday night. Josh and I were on a team and Sarah and Thomas were on a team.
If you have never played this game, it's part charades, part Pictionary (sometimes you draw with your eyes closed), and part name that tune (you have to humm a song and your teammate guesses).
Our turn came and the card we pulled was a drawing "Pictionary" type category. Josh was the artist and I guessed. The hint...A Band.
Josh began drawing a stick figure with a sitar and I have no idea what band this could possibly be. I am guessing...he's drawing more stick people...Josh yells "C'mon Mandy you HAVE to get this!!!"
Finally time ran out.
The answer????
PEARL JAM
Did Josh draw a pearl or a jar of jam...NO...he draws stick Eddie Vedder with what looks like a sitar and expects me to figure it out.
I managed to act out Ticker Tape Parade and get Josh to guess THAT before the timer ran out.
We have decided next game night we'll get a sports trivia game so we have a chance at winning.

Baseball is upon us.
I have 2 boys
In 2 different leagues
Playing in 2 different towns
BUT ON THE SAME DAY!

I leave work at 4, run to see the 1st hour of Jagger's game at Mile Square Park.
I leave that game at 5:30 to watch the last hour of Stephen's game at Huntington High.

Josh and Jag had dinner together somewhere. Stephen and I had dinner together separately and I got home just in time to catch Josh in the driveway as he was leaving for work.

Then I had a minor breakdown over a beautiful Sugarland Song and realized my kids are growing up too fast, I can't slow life down or stop these kids from growing up too fast.

I know one day I'll miss running around to baseball games with my boys.

So yesterday I got a bit if a "bad stomach" (that's P.C. for flaming diarrhea).
I thought I would die. I had to make the long trip to the restroom about 50 times. There is a long walk down the first isle of my office (lined with cubicles full of friends who want to chat), then make a left, then a long walk down another hall to the restroom.
Every time I went to the restroom I prayed that I wouldn't let one go or mess my pants.
I wanted to go home so bad but I wasn't sure I would make the drive without a "mishap" so I just stayed at work (I know..I'm a trooper).
I had moments in the bathroom where I hid in the stall full of shame for what I had just subjected my coworkers to. I felt the need to apologize or explain the horrible noises coming from my stall. We all try and act like nothing happened when we hear questionable noises coming from the neighboring stall but who are we kidding? The least I could have done was say "Sorry about that folks!" even My Bad! would have sounded better than the awkward silence followed by 3 courtesy flushes.
I kept telling myself "Mandy! You should have brought some bathroom shoes with you!"

Many of the clothes in my closet were placed on a conveyor belt in order to purchase them
It was a sobering realization.
My only consolation is there is probably some stimulus money set aside for people like me.

Josh is managing Jagger's baseball team this year which is coach pitch.

We have 3 sets of parents eager to help out whenever we ask, then we have another group that is eager to talk crap about every child on the team with the exception of their own of course.
Since we are short on helpers, I was lucky enough to be bench coach for Jag's game yesterday.
I was literally locked in a cage with 12 six year old boys armed with bats, helmets and water bottles. Somehow I managed to keep the chaos to a minimum and lose my voice screaming for the boys in pinstripes.

One boy wet his pants just before the start of the game, 2 kids got hit in the nose with the ball and 1 kid got hit in "the nethers".

It was the best of times it was the worst of times...

I am finally getting to know the boys' names so now the boy formerly known as "the one who's mom had a baby on Thursday" is called "Timmy" and the boy known as "kid who stands ON home plate facing the pitcher when he gets up to bat" is now called "Bobby".

But I digress...

We had a pizza party on Friday and after Josh and I left the complainer parents began to do their thing.

We lost our first 2 games and that of course means the coach sucks right! One parent actually said "I wish we had a more complete team". Now, if you mean complete as in a team who keeps their pants completely dry I agree but I don't think that's what he meant. Another parent is constantly complaining LOUDLY in the stands that we need a better pitcher (remember this is coach pitch so you have a grown man volunteering to throwing the ball at small children with a 2 inch strike zone). Our team mom asked "complainer dad" to volunteer to pitch or umpire a game but he refused to help (typical!). The same day we got an anonymous email (chicken) telling us to bench one kid who is a little hyped out so we can win some games. Great idea buddy! Our mantra can be "Win if you can...lose if you must but ALWAYS CHEAT!"

Josh made it clear that he (unlike some other managers) will always play by the rules and let all the kids play ball in the infield and outfield just like the rules mandate. Some managers stick the less capable players in the outfield the entire game and Josh will not do that. They need to learn at this age.

Yesterday we won! The kids looked great, Josh walks on water as far as the parents are concerned and we did it all by the book.

For those of you interested in watching a game they are at Mile Square Park on the Brookhurst side. You can find the schedule by clicking here. Look for the Yankee games.

Stephen was very sick about a month ago so we took him to the doctor.
The pediatrician gave Stephen some medicine then advised us he was in need of a physical and booster shots.
Today was the big booster shot/physical day and this was a perfect opportunity for Stephen to get a few laughs out of the medical office staff.
Stephen is 14 years old, about 5'7" and he's been shaving for about 1 year. Stephen no doubt feels weird walking into a doctors office with Disney characters on the wall but that's where you go when you're 14 so you might as well make the most of what could be your last visit to your pediatricians office.
Josh works nights so he and Jag took Stephen to his doctor visit. The Wright boys were out alone without my supervision which is never a good thing.
The doctor checked the usual...ears, nose, throat, then the doctor warned Stephen (and his audience) that she would now be "checking things down below". Josh and Jag covered their faces with a piece of paper and a book and giggled like little girls until they were told it was OK to look. One would think that a father would have taken this time to explain why the doctor would check things down there but Josh decided it was good to make a good weenie joke out of it.
The doctor then sent in a nurse to administer 6 shots. Stephen got his shots and proceeded to jokingly scream like a girl every time he was poked. He threw out a "PLEASE MAKE IT STOP" and a "NOT ANOTHER ONE!!!" then begged LOUDLY for a lolly pop or something to make the pain go away. The nurse is toward the end of her pregnancy and couldn't stop laughing. Pregnant ladies laughing uncontrollably is a sketchy thing at best but Stephen rolled the dice and the nurses bladder stayed in tact.
Finally on the way out he stopped to give a urine sample. As he handed the specimen to the male nurse waiting outside the bathroom door he gave a slick little snap, wink, point combo and said "Good luck with that!"
I'm now waiting for the letter from his pediatrician to advise me he's ready for the big people doctor now.